That was one of the worst weeks of football I’ve ever seen. I’m not just talking about a quarter of the San Francisco roster playing on a Thursday. So many strong teams almost blew the easiest games (Steelers vs Cowboys, Chiefs vs Panthers, arguably Patriots vs Jets). Not to mention the most boring SNF I’ve seen, and it had to happen the one year I was rooting for Brady mid-season. Any given Sunday. Except none of those teams actually got an upset; they only helped the teams that bet on them. Which was not me, so I declare that Vegas is evil. At least the Cardinals and Seahawks lost.
Last Week’s Scores: 9-4
Last Week’s Lines: 4-9
Overall Scores: 85-38-1
Overall Lines: 61-61
Colts @ Titans
5:20 pm (TNF) PT IND -1
Let’s get a petition to stop putting important division games on a Thursday night slot. Unless it is the Titans and Jaguars, per tradition. The Colts usually match up well against the Titans, and they will get TY Hilton back. They’ve only ruled one played out, Jack Doyle, but the Colts have plenty of serviceable tight ends available. The Titans have ruled out four players, including Adoree Jackson and Adam Humphries. Clowney had two full practices, and should return. He is much more important to Tennessee than an ineffective Hilton has been for Indy, and Rivers has been very inconsistent this season. Tannehill has been reliable, and I see Derrick Henry plowing through a tired Colts defense at will. This should be an easy win for the Titans, even on a Thursday.
TEN wins 26-23
Texans @ Browns
10:00 am PT CLE -3
Who would win? A rested Browns team or the complete disaster that is Houston? How do you let the backup Jaguars quarterback compete with Deshaun Watson? And only win because of a crucial delay of game was not called? Disgusting. They also lost “valuable trade acquisition” David Johnson to a concussion, who is unlikely to play this week. The Browns get pro-bowler Austin Hooper back. If things go right, Cleveland can win this matchup for the first time since 2007.
CLE wins 31-25
WFT @ Lions
10:00 am PT DET -4.5
Be ready for more Alex Smith! Kyle Allen got hurt again last week, and Dwayne Haskins has been a huge bust. I feel bad for Allen, but I have to admit that I love watching Alex start again after his own gruesome injury and years of torture in San Francisco. Detroit had their own injury scare with Matthew Stafford, but he should be good to go with a neck injury. That’s pretty good news since a concussion was suspected. The Lions will be out Kenny Golladay, and potentially TJ Hockenson after re-aggravated toe injury. Stafford might lose his two best targets against Washington.
WSH wins 23-17
Jaguars @ Packers
10:00 am PT GB -13.5
How about Jake Luton having a good debut against Houston? If only that could last against the Packers. The Packers have a pass rush good enough to ruin the rookie’s day, and I don’t think the Jags can get away with running the ball much. Rodgers is going to torch the Jacksonville secondary, and Aaron Jones showed on Thursday that he is healthy and ready to dominate again. Several Jaguars O-linemen have had limited practices, and the Packers are rested. Poor Luton.
GB wins 36-24
Eagles @ Giants
10:00 am PT PHI -3.5
Not this matchup again. At least the Eagles should be more watchable. They have a lot of guys coming back, including Alshon Jeffery, Malik Jackson, Jack Driscoll, and Miles Sanders. I’d like to shout-out their official website for being so clean and giving very clear and specific injury information. The Eagles won a close 1-point victory earlier in the season, but this is the healthiest they’ve looked in a long time. Must be nice. On paper, this should be an easy win against a bad Giants team who can only play well against Washington.
PHI wins 30-20
Buccaneers @ Panthers
10:00 am PT TB -5.5
I’m going to guess the Bucs can score more than 3 points this time. I have no idea how that offense can do so badly against the Saints. Maybe Brady just had an old-man day and couldn’t come back against a good Saints defense. He had no help from his own D, or run game. Guard Ali Marpet is practicing again after suffering a concussion, and no players sat out of Wednesday’s practice due to injury. The Panthers have lost star Christian McCaffrey again, who is doubtful. He hurt his shoulder on the final drive against Kansas City. In that game, he rushed 18 times for 69 yards and a score, and caught 10 balls for 82 yards and another score. Mike Davis has been good, but can’t replicate that kind of game. If CMC was healthy, I’d say the Panthers could get an easy upset against a Bucs team with no momentum. This injury hurts a lot.
TB wins 26-22
Broncos @ Raiders
1:05 pm PT LV -4.5
The Broncos managed to have a 21 point 4th quarter, and still did not come back against the FALCONS last week. That shows how much of a mess their offense was for most of the game, not to mention the defense. I’m sure part of it is Drew Lock, but his line is hurt, his weapons are hurt, and Pat Shurmur has always been inconsistent as an OC. At least AJ Bouye is back for Denver, but the team is riddled with players on the Injury Report. The Raiders have been very strong in division games this year. I expect that will continue.
LV wins 33-23
Chargers @ Dolphins
1:05 pm PT MIA -2
Tua had a pretty good game against Arizona, in only his second start. But Xavien Howard needs to be appreciated. The man shut down Deandre Hopkins, and he is never talked about. I’m curious to see if he moves to the slot against Keenan Allen. Miami has not lost since week 4, and have all the momentum in the world. Most players on their Injury Report had full practices on Thursday. Los Angeles will see Joey Bosa return on Sunday, and will be competitive against Miami.
MIA wins 31-27
Bills @ Cardinals
1:05 pm PT ARI -2.5
Like I predicted last week, Allen returned to form when needed. After earning 4 total touchdowns, Arizona should be worried. John Brown returned to practice after being held out on Wednesday. For Arizona, Budda Baker missed both practices so far. Defensive Coordinator Vance Joseph said he expects Baker to play, but I never fully trust a coach on these statements. And even if Baker does play, it won’t be up to his standard. I think the Cardinals are the best team in the division, but this will be a tough game for them.
BUF wins 38-32
Seahawks @ Rams
1:25 pm PT LAR -1.5
The Rams have one huge advantage against the Seahawks: Injuries. Seattle has 21 players on their Injury Report, and the secondary is hit especially hard. Jamal Adams returned against Buffalo. As of Wednesday, (Seattle releases their injury updates very late in the day) their top corners Shaquille Griffin and Quinton Dunbar did not practice. Their running backs are still hurt, as is KJ Wright. The Rams are healthy and just had a bye. Their team is more balanced and usually plays Seattle very well.
LAR wins 36-34
Bengals @ Steelers
1:25 pm PT PIT -7
The last time the Bengals won this division matchup was in 2015, two games before the best/worst wild card game of all time. AFC North football is something else. The Steelers get to face a rookie with a horrible O-line. Joe Mixon has not practiced this week, so Bernard should be the starting Bengals running back again. The Steelers only had one player not practice on Thursday, backup running back Anthony McFarland. In a strong afternoon lineup, this game will probably the worst of the bunch (excluding the 49ers @ Saints of course). The Bengals are off a bye, but this is the worst possible matchup for Cincy.
PIT wins 35-23
Ravens @ Patriots
5:20 pm (SNF) PT BAL -7
Are you ready to watch New England on a short week, after they barely beat Joe Flacco and the Jets? Against the Ravens? Well too bad! Both teams have had their best defensive players sit out of Thursday practice. Calais Campbell for the Ravens, and Stephon Gilmore for the Patriots. There’s some promise in that Newton was able to complete a comeback, but Baltimore is a much better team than New York. They’re competent.
BAL wins 28-20
Vikings @ Bears
5:15 pm (MNF) PT MIN -2.5
The Bears currently have a 4-game win streak against the Vikings. These are the four games since Kirk Cousins was Viking. The most Minnesota has scored in that time is 20 points. That alone makes me doubt the Vikings, even if they started playing much better while Chicago is trending downwards.
CHI wins 23-16
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Go Rams! The more Seattle loses the better.
Thanks Shanafandom. The Dilly Dilly Sentence of the Week is awarded to “At least Cardinals and Seahawks lost.” That’s what we wanna see!